16 September 2008

Men are the new women???

Strangely, I've been watching a little of ftv Pakistan and I've been disgusted/disappointed/distressed/disillusioned and all other "dis"es including depressed. There are two primary reasons, I'll deal with the more pressing one right now.
Yesterday, i was watching ftv when they were showing the launch of an event at a local restaurant called Dish. By the look of it, it seemed a pretty high end restaurant. The host introduced the owner of the restaurant, who had a pretty manly name "JALAL". Anyways, seconds later the guy appeared and i was shocked. He was pretty well built, but i swear i could tell he was wearing a little make up and my God when he spoke, it was embarrassing. What is cool about a man speaking like a woman? Seriously, metrosexuality is going way out of hand.
Now some of my readers might consider me politically very incorrect for the above mentioned comments but i can bet if they'd have the same reaction. If this was some isolated incident, i would've condoned it, but about 70 percent of the men they interviewed were literally on the verge of being women. I mean why'd you do that to yourself? I wont really like to name people but we all know how many men in our fashion industry are tilted towards their feminine sides. The reasons can be kaleidoscopic, and each one depressing than the other. Anyways, all this was just to establish the gravity of this prevalent situation. I by no means at any point would be making fun of any such people, but i genuinely want to discuss this issue because its been pressing me for a very long time.

Anyways, lets start with investigating metrosexuality. I tried looking it up on dictionary.com but got no results so i'd like to set vague boundaries for it. This is a phenomenon whereby MEN begin to care for their physical appearances, to the EXTENT and IN THE WAYS that women do. I used capitals here because i wanted to leave no confusion as to what could be referred to as metrosexuality. Obviously, this definition is very challengeable. anyways, needless to say i am sure we all know what it really is and we have plenty of examples to accompany our definitions.

Moving on, lets see if this situation is really prevalent in our society in general or is it only the fashion gentry also called the "f people" that have been struck by this phenomenon. I'll try to prove my point with the help of a variety of examples.

Example#1: I remember i went to a a barber's shop an year or so ago. i sat there waiting for my turn when i heard a strangely westernized Urdu accent that we get to hear from lots of people these days, from inside a small compartment. i didn't know what was all this about until i paid a little attention. Apparently, at that time, the guy (who for some reason appeared a girl to me) was getting his manicure and pedicure done, and was to follow that up with a facial. DAMN i thought.

Example#2:
I have a cousin, a MALE cousin, who uses fair and lovely. Balke I have a friend who does that too.
Example#3:Recently, specialist MEN's fairness creams have been introduced. they've been named "Fair and Handsome" and God knows wat. Infact, the advertisements are so pathetic they show a guy with low self esteem just because he is dark. (Where did tall, dark and handsome go????)
Example#4: I've mentioned the Fashion people before and they've to be mentioned again. Look at our male models, most of them, and most our designers and makeup artists have tipped over to the other side. i wont be taking names as such.
Example#5: While in Daewoo, me and my friends came across a khawar riaz advertisement in the Daewoo magazine. The caption was "Men are the new women" and the guy pictured was wearing stuff (or not wearing stuff!!!) that got me red with embarrassment. I mean, even i was deeply deeply embarrassed and we were asking eachother, "How would he live with this??". to top it all, the posture that he had in the picture was nothing short of the most provocative of FEMALE super models. this, to date has been one of the most disturbing images i have EVER seen!!!
Example#6: Makeup for grooms has been the in thing these days and i have witnessed a disaster or two at family weddings. Grooms would go to get their facial done, would use masks and creams and face washes and manicures and pedicures and what not to look....the same in the end...huh
Example#7: Last but not the least, men spend more time grooming themselves than doing physical activities. obviously i am not talking about all men.

These were just a few of the examples that came to my mind right now but they are all utterly disturbing. I totally understand that its everyone's choice to do what they want in a free world, but some things when they go out of hand lead to nothing but vain vain vain VAIN people.

Having established the presence of this disease or phenomenon in our society, lets see what are the real causes for the rising metrosexuality.
1.Media has practically changed the way we think about everything. From skin colors to hair colors, virtually everything has a new definition. and this is mostly because of the blind faith in Western media and their society.
2.The fashion industry glamorized men in a way that Tall Dark and Handsome was no longer the standard, it had to be Fair and Delicate. Standardizing looks in itself is a disgusting phenomenon, whether you talk about men or women. I believe that saying this is the perfect MAN or WOMAN is infact blasphemous to the whole concept of humanity because every person was made beautiful in a different way. not straying from the topic, the fashion industry brought in the culture of more feminine men being cool and CREATIVE and i don't know where that comes from.
3.To all that the fashion industry brought, it also brought a culture of homosexuality. I can see raised eyebrows, but we all know this is true. Designers, makeup artists, photographers and publicists have all been seeking and taking sexual favours from the male models they've made famous or promised to. Obviously not everyone is like that but the people who are of this kind are so famous that i needn't even mention them. But i'd like to quote just one example which i feel is very contemporary and has been the hot issue in the fashion industry in the past few days. Sheikh Amer Hussain, the famous designer who was killed recently, was known to seek sexual favours from young boys who dreamt of being famous. The evidence of sorts was also there on his website where young boys were made to do shoots in various states of undress under the banner of new talent. Moreover, its been heard that his murderer was caught who said that the aforementioned designer actually tried to sexually assault him!! this matter certainly needs a looking into.
4.Maybe some women are at fault too as they went on to accept the new standards of looks for men. but they cannot be blamed much because men did the same when such standards were set for women until it all became very normal.
5.With the youth having no directions whatsoever, a lot of room is left to be exploited by brands and companies who want to sell their products at the expense of the society. If this wasn't true, why would fairness creams be there??? isn't that depicting an embedded flaw in us. I mean they fought the Apartheid to get rid of color discrimination and now its projected as very acceptable??

i know there a lot of other causes and a i have to say a lot on this topic, but right now i think i want an opinion on whether this really is a big problem???




I'd like to end with a small convo i had with a friend:
mha: "if you have two options, one is to get a facial done and the other is to jump into the sea, what'd you do??"
imran: "Obviously i'd jump into the sea"

just wanted to end on a lighter note, but i believe i'll continue on this topic later inshaAllah

16 comments:

Unknown said...

metrosexuality is sooooooooooo 90s man !!! women want a real man now !!! huh !!!

Unknown said...

most of the things you talk about are quite common these... so they must be working... either pyschologicaly or physically... and i don't see any harm in one getting himself pampered after following a tiresome routine, treat it same as "MALISH" which u i suppose think is quite manly... pehlwan waghera :P

m.h.a said...

@ahmed
thanx for commenting, MALISH is a totally different thing from manicures, pedicures, facials, masks, piercings etc. Infact, there isn't even a reason to talk about malish here. Malish is done for relaxation, for healing of pains, to get rid of cramps or whatever, but the other things, you know are only meant to focus on the looks! Compare Spas to Malish, that'll be okay.
Thanx anyways

Unknown said...

no boy... ever tried one???? manicures and pedicures are basically stress relievers ask any one... and i never talked abt piercings... by the way yeh kis jaga hoti hain :P

Anonymous said...

wow ..long post!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

after this lengthy post, you still want to continue on this?
i read ur post from the end to the start :D

lol, well men with womanly manners is kinda entertaining to watch :p esp on fashion shows/tv and blah

also the fairness cream ads for men was one thing i was really happy for..i mean i was tired of watching those ridiculous ads of girls with fairness creams lol

and abt that sheikh guy who died recently...well ya there is some fishy and mysterious story behind that murder :S

m.h.a said...

@mubi
finally aap again...
Well its entertaining for you but for me it depressing, i mean seeing my gender going down the wrong wrong lane like that...anyways, you're right there's lots of mist surrounding that murder esp since his reputation was like that...

Waisay how can you read from the end to the start?

And stop being entertained by all this, and all the fairness cream ads, we should do something about both the genders.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I hear ya, man, I hear ya!! Glad to see someone who shares my irritation/frustration/aggravation on this topic! I mean, heck, where did changing-their-car's-engine-oil-themselves men go?? I agree with Sami here, teenage girls might like those girly-girly guys but a girl in her 20's and onwards, who has seen a bit of world, would NEVER choose a guy who spends as much time as her in the spa!! We can't tell a guy like that to fix the pipe, he would be too worried about his manicure going wasted! :P

I remember sitting in university seeing a junior with such intricate french beard that I asked my friend about how much time he must have spent infront of a mirror creating all that art!! Surely more than myself! And I would HATE a guy spending more time than me infront of a mirror!! :P

And...ahem... I guess, West meant that 'dark' in Tall, Dark and Handsome as in dark HAIRED!! :D anyways, this brings me to the dark complexion thing!! What's wrong with having dark complexion? I have a cousin who's dark and a gori told him that she would place him in top-5 of most attractive men she has seen in all her life. And she being a Londoner and all must have seen guys of every color!!

and yes, I agree with you that all this emphasis on looks has been brought by media. When did looks become so important? Look different, buy desinger stuff so you can be differentiated from 'common' people. That dark complex will ruin your life, do something about it. Shedding those few extra pounds can get the love of your life, use our diet soup. If you want to get your dream job, use this fairness cream.

Ugh! I need to stop!! I can go on and on forever on this topic!!

P.S. So nice to know that guys from the younger generation still prefer looking like a man!! :)

m.h.a said...

@shysoul
thanx for reading and commenting...
Actually, my point was not majorly that women like metrosexual men, all i meant was that at some point of time they did promote the trend. That didn't mean k women right now are in favour of it.
Nevertheless, the trends still very much there, in our society that is. All around us, you can feel that the society is going towards greater discrimination everyday, and you're right in pointing out that in real life, all that doesn't matter, but we're made to believe that looks and APPEARING different by wearing designer stuff etc is everything. What this has done apart from everything else is that it has totally sidelined all other standards in the eyes of the youth, for example intellect, professionalism etc...i hope that this trend of men turning into touch-me-nots is put to an end...

And thanx, there're still lots of guys who cant stand the idea of going near "fair n handsome fairness cream"...so all's not yet lost :)

Anonymous said...

@ mha
ehehehe,, well i read it starting from the end,,this way the post didnt look that big :D

and hmm on a serious note well ya of course i mean who would want a sissy around you all the time? :S
i agree to most of what shysoul (welcome to mha's blog) said,,esp the mirror part ehehe

your post actually reminded me of begum nawazish..what started off with only acting out a woman has taken a totally different thing even when you see that guy out of that character,,no?

Unknown said...

that guy is actually a woman inside... apparently he has been to shrinks and all but its jus da way it is...

m.h.a said...

@mubi
oh yeah begum nawazish got too far with what he loved doing. But i think abi saray logo k itne halaat nae kharab huay, u knw, thats an extraordinary case.

Has anyone seen Sahir Lodhi? I hate that guy. Just telling. He's not metro but i hate that guy anyways.

Anonymous said...

ooooooooooo i HATE sahir lodhi :S omG what is he anyway? lol
his show is so annoying :p hes not a metro..normal married guy i guess but he puts on too much of make up and acts so weirdly,,more of a wanna bee and thats sad!

Anonymous said...

have you seen ammar bilal frm ABCD ... no he is Mr Metrosexual in pakistan

m.h.a said...

@mubi
sahir lodhi is just plain stupid and thats all i know...i hate him and the show, and he's so irritating, i dunno why people come to the show even.

@nando
yeah ammar bilal seriously has lost his senses. I mean even amna haq is more manly than he is!

Anonymous said...

but no one can beat begum nawaish ali ...why isnt anyone talking of him/her??? :