Fickle feelings

Wandering around the streets of this city full of life,
the brightly lit embellished alleys of human joy,
sunshine of the most festive sun attempting to bathe me,
in its colours its hues all shades that seem high!

Yet my heart flinches at every step it flips and swirls,
fails to be one with the city of joy,
refuses to mingle with the mingle of emotions,
uneasy, awkward, fickle emotions it wont buy.

A faint yearning one of its kind,
one that looks for things beneath the skin, the cover thats so fake,
one that refuses to be one with the many,
the many who preach love yet nurture and hate.

I walk empty headed empty chested,
like a lifeless body floating on the sea of time,
yet i'm closer to this thing called life than them,
them who stopped searching and couldnot find.

Their smiles carry tears like their cupped hands,
their faces speak of joys but their hearts know its an illusion,
their eyes are pursed but mares try to penetrate,
what they mistake for satisfaction, is confusion!

I wonder how not caring can make you happy,
when something that enormous is missing from everything,
that something that turns these dreams to reality,
puts your heart at rest, true joy it brings.

Wandering around the streets of this city full of life,
i carefully look for what is missing,
but i see void all around me,
songs laborious their hearts refuse to sing.

I wonder if we can bring it back again,
i wonder if the world will ever laugh again,
the sunshine, when will it turn real?
These alleys i wonder, when will they see light once again.