tick tock

Every hour here is pretty strange. Lets take one of the 12 examples each day.

6:59…shucks one minute left that’s it, damn I had to iron clothes, make a smoothie, iron my clothes, dust the car and now there’d no light in the garage, had to vacuum my carpet, my cell’s running out of battery so is my laptop, and a bigger problem, only one minute till my modem goes off nadd I can post this post no longer, I had to do my research for my report, had to mail umair my cv, had to change my status on facebook, well that I can do from my cell too but still, I had to watch that match on tv and fight with sis for the remote, damn the match would be over effectively when the electricity comes back again, one minute one minute one minute, damn, so much to do so little time, so little so little what should I do first….mmmmmmmm

7:00…*BLUCK*

In the dim light of UPS powered energy savers and noisy fans I sit there in helplessness, almost expecting to be surprised by the WAPDA people, that for once we’d have another hour of civilization. But no. Strangely, WAPDA employs sadistically punctual people but who can blame them, its obviously very pleasing to make so many millions helpless with the push of one button…aaargh…

7:01… haye its okay, I can rest for a while, play solitaire till the battery of the lappy goes out…sigh sigh sigh

And an hour passes, like the negative part of the sine wave, yes its that mechanical now.

7:59… power’s about to be back what should I do what should I do…yessssssssss I’m so lucky its gonna come back yoohoo…

Like it wasn’t supposed to…

8:00… thank God…lets see…hmmmmmm…I’m so happy I cant think of anything to do, really, Kasmay…so happy so happy….woohoooo

And the happiness lasts for another 59 minutes. Needless to say, nothing can be done in that time period, because of sheer joy. Its like the most intense high, experienced 12 times everyday yet more powerful than the last.

Who needs drugs?

craving...

Sometimes you just want somethings so bad like you cannot really control your desires ... you cry like a baby you become extremely restless.Its like this strong craving that penetrates your soul and makes you lose your senses.I wonder if it carries the same intensity for everyone but in my case ,it really is the maximum.I feel i can sacrifice anything to fulfill my desire.Its like that yummy dripping dark chocolate simply irrisitible !
I wish i could really quote an example but right now thats all i want to write but i am sure i'll be able to explain it more ...maybe... when my innerself allows me
for now i just wish something satisfies my soul ...and ummm that time will come soon inshaAllah

anotherone

Good time for another one :p

well I’ve been doing a lot. But I don’t think I should mention all of that. Its like I began a completely new life. A really beautiful one. Other than that, I might quote some of my adventures from time to time.

And btw it feels really strange to be writing again, because for the past 6 7 months, the stuff I have written has been of completely different nature :p writing on my blog seems completely different. But I will settle down inshaAllah. Once I get back my blog friends that is :p.

One person I know who’d be reading this is mubi, not because she was a very loyal reader but because I’m going to bug her into reading this, and like a good girl she will (pardon the makhan :p). All the other people I might have to wait for but then Mr. Smacula has never dissppointed me, always been an excellent senior, a UETian helping another. There are other people too, but there’s no way I can remind them that I exist L these two I can catch thru that thing called facebook. But not to worry, I brought it all onto me myself.

So much has been going on in and around our beloved piece of land these days. And so much has not been happening. I say that because half the day, there is no electricity anyways. Like literally ofr 12 hours we are in the dark. Remember when we were kids we used to wonder about lands imn the arctic where it used to be a whole season of day and another of night?? Ab paish kartay hain new and improved, ek ghanta din aur ek raat. Like a zebra, black white black white, and surprisingly that’s the only thing we are more than consistent at, they don’t miss a chance to make us sweat. And rightly so, we’re the poor citizens and not people who go around the city in their 4x4s, looking at the common man in disgust. We are the disgusting common men. People who sweat and go dark and don’t have air conditioners that run on generators fueled by the government’s purse. I have a lot on my mind with regard to all that. And its gonna come out soon inshaAllah.

may a gya

Ahm ahm…its kinda awkward, slightly difficult and extremely embarrassing. Its like ummmmm…like a village guy who had a little bit of respect in his village, runs away from his home, his village and after some time, realizes that Damn! I need to go back. Not that the village needs the negligent chap, but for his own sake.

Now he’s in a predicament, a very awkward situation. He doesn’t know how he will be greeted. He could be welcomed with garlands, he could be. Or, he could be thrown stones at. But these two situations would only be considered if he ummmm is not forgotten. He could be ignored, all the people he had got to know would have certainly moved on and rightly so, he wasn’t much of a company either, not to regular not to committed in his commitments to them not too interested in his interests. So when he went away, not a lot of people exactly saw the butterfly effect, they didn’t feel it. But like I said, the village boy felt the gravity of what he had done, what he had missed and what he was missing. And he realized that because his life had become the most beautiful the most wholesome it had ever been. It had changed completely from the last time he saw his village. And he was made to realize by the person who changed his life that the village was an integral part of him.

He doesn’t know if there will be people who’d visit him when he’d go to the village, doesn’t even know if he’d ever get a place to live in. that doesn’t mean the people are cruel or mean or unwelcoming, but it’s a common observation and a deserved punishment for being negligent towards something you love so much.

But then, that’s life, when someone makes you realize something, some mistake, it makes you a better person, and it makes you even better if you go back on the mistake if you can and ask for the people involved to take you back if they can. Certainly the other villagers have been really nice people.

Maybe, its time I go back, irrespective of the treatment I’d receive.

To anyone who missed me, I’m sorry. To all the ones who didn’t, its good I don’t have to apologise to everyone :p…

But it feels awesome to be back to my blog. Been long.

And thankyou MAQ for making me realize.

Btw MAQ is the person who made my life the most beautiful a person could have.

True love brings you back from the deepest of dungeons.